Awkward and Awesome in Jerusalem

Awkward

• One guy and five girls incited polygamist comments frequently, "Morrrrmons? Morrrmons? Oooooh I see, one family. One famalee." Uh, no. Not those kind of Mormons.
• The 50+ shopkeeper that cornered Lauren and repeatedly asked her to dinner. You can't barter your way into a date, buddy.
• Imagining Mary prego, walking through the Judaen Wilderness. There is nothing there. It's you and a donkey and 100+ weather and Joseph. That's all. Woof.
• My Modern Near East-Palestine teacher's slights at America during lecture. You do realize we are all American, right?
• The man who sat next to me in an Israeli Jazz concert, took off his shoes, and then produced absurd rubbing noises for the remainder of the concert especially during the quiet parts. Sir, this is a classy concert, not a take-off-your-shoes-add-your-own-sound-effects concert.
• The amount of sweat I produce per day. It's in the gallons, folks.
• Turkey orientation: "...you'll be paying for your own toilet paper. Generally, for one very small square of toilet paper."
• I'm diseased. Lots of phlegm everywhere.

Awesome

• Finding Emily's and Jeanelle's notes to me in Aladin's money changing business. Love you gurls!
• I'm crushing on all my classes. How great it is that I get to spend this whole semester studying history and people of the Middle East, which I LOVE? The past few weeks have very nearly convinced me to pull a Condelizzarice Rice and switch my major from Neuroscience to Middle Eastern Studies and minor in Arabic. Then the CIA would hire me as a Middle Eastern expert until I got a gig as Minister of Foreign Affairs. Ilovemymajor Ilovemymajor Ilovemymajor.
• Falafel. Nom nom nom.
• The security staff here at the Jerusalem Center. On class outings they follow us around and stop traffic and help us down steep hills and lead really hard conditioning classes twice a week. My thighs are burning.
• Roomies! I'm loving how my life always turns out better than expected. Perfect, in fact.
• TURKEY. I'm spending the next week in TURKEY.

Judaen Wilderness. Less wilderness, more desolation.

Oh hey roomies! First day of school!

Again, taken from my balcony :)

Shabot Shalom!

I'm entirely sure what that means...something nice about the Sabbath though. Like a Sabbath greeting? Here we have Saturday Sabbath and lemme tell ya, I could get used to this. It definitely bodes well for procrastination purposes.

I've been here for a little less than a week and already there is too much to say. So I'm gonna bullet point it. If I could I'd bullet all my communications.

• The Jerusalem Center is spectacular. This is the view from my window.
  
  Yes, that's the Dome of the Rock, and the Mount of Olives, and the Old City. No I will never get used to it.
• Sometimes it seems like all we do is eat all. the. time. Junior twenty here I come. I’ve had a stellar time trying out all the local cuisine but I’ve been amazed by some of my more conservative classmates. At breakfast I sat next to a guy eating French toast and pancakes. Um hello? You’re in Israel. #whatareyoudoing
• This week's highlight: Garden tomb with tour guide Pastor Atkins. Pastor Atkins is a retired Church of England pastor and just generally a beautiful man. As we toured the potential Golgotha and tomb sites he gave a wonderful sermon about it being the person, Jesus the Christ, and not the place that we celebrate. "One of the few definitions I know of heaven is coming face to face with our Lord. As we lay down our life for Him may we come face to face with Him in joy and thanksgiving." Such a lovely man.
• I was surprised by the number of people who cried out at us as we passed by and obviously knew BYU and the ‘mormons’.Today when a shopkeeper stopped us and asked if we were Mormons, new-found friend Lauren asked how he knew and he replied “the eyes, the eyes.” Isn’t that nice?

Jordan and Mandy

Mandy and friend were in town last night so I took a few shots right at sunset. Purrrrrfect lighting. Take a looksie, I think some of them turned out really nice despite my being such a novice...of course it helps when you're shooting such a good-looking couple :)










Don't you just love Love?

Summa Lovin'

Summer is the magical season when you never know exactly what will happen. And this summer some very magical things did happen (cue nostalgia). I finally pruned my gmail inbox to an anorexic 3 unread messages. The HP legacy ended. I started a diet of entirely chocolate. Best friend and roommate got engaged. Alexa graduated. Five elderly women now hold a piece of my heart. I managed to spend a good 57.1% of my summer unwashed (that's showering 3 days of the week on average...disgusted anyone?). God kindly let me serve for two months in my most coveted calling: Relief Society teacher. And lastly, I only lost a single shoe in the move. This is the record among moving-day records, including 'Most Toothbrushes Found' or 'Largest Spider Killed'. One shoe isn't even really a whole item; it is half of one item. This is momentous, friends.

Luckily, I don't have to be too sad about the end of summer because I have some even better things in store.

I am SO excited :)

The Best Thing Since...Canned Bread?

Attempt #1

Attempt Dos

We opened both ends of the can and pushed that sucka through.

Appetizing, no?

The final verdict:

Shout out to my lovely Mickers for gifting me some canned bread and my brave Mai Mai for digging into it with me. Nom nom nom :)

My scanner was feeling mutinous...

Today I found this picture of how cool my parents are.


In words, really kewl.

Alexa asked my dad what his favorite thing about my mom is and he said that she has never been boring. TRU THAT. If you really know my mom you are laughing.

Bahahahaha

"Alexa, what is all this junk in your trunk?"

Moving can be really awful because you have to spend all that time around dust and cobwebs and cardboard boxes and everyone is Mr. Grumpy-Pants because they are constantly teetering on hoarder-dom until I force them to throw said blanket/candle/childhood plaything out (definitely watch too much of TLC's show Hoarders). But sometimes moving can also be fun, especially when you discover that you have enough backpacks to supply a small African school or a mutinous army of toothbrushes or a couple of corsets that apparently don't belong to anyone in the family...

Wait what?

If you have never moved houses before you might try it out sometime. Try everything once, I always say. Perhaps on a date?

I dream of...Devin?

Top five most dreamt about people:

1. My Mom – often dying, sometimes re-marrying after my dad’s death

2. My Dad – often dying, sometimes mourning after my mom’s death

3. Alexa - often involved in crime

4. Beautiful Alaskan man, code name Clark Kent – always as my friend and secret lover

5. 32-yr old man I used to work with – always first-kiss dreams

I believe in the power of dreams. I also believe my subconscious likes to screw with me. A 32 year old man, subconscious? …ok so you got me this time. I may be in love with Devin.